Tuesday, July 21, 2009

The push and pull factor in confusion.
These days I am fearing/hating /abhoring myself of loving to live life in my comfort zone. Guess we all enjoy entangling ourself into the chain of certainity that we have woven , the circle of friends , the job where everyone knows you and smiles at , the world that we live in and all the silly to horrendously silly circle of influences that surround us.
We feel that being where we are is more than the perfect state of being for us . Any shift or drift will mean a jolt and our life will never again be the same.

To a certain extent this confusion drives most of us and to some offcourse it just does not drive they are stuck in the middle , so this is not for that fortunate set.

"Status quo" definately in management books and everywhere else in the world where life is difficult to manage means low risk… life gets simpler , you are in control of things and are getting controlled by comfort and end of the day your just an ounce more of it . Your body clock is set you don’t even need any alarms in your life.. instead they alarm you if they do ever ring. Well that’s exactly the point I am reaching to and maybe many of you reading will have already made it there..
So Welcome on board!

Now you have made that choice of leading a simple life sans change and challenge.. but then are you really growing beyond numbers and proportions , receding hairline and appearing facial lines. We may like pruning the branches every now and then , but few of us want to pull of the roots and plant ourselves on a different soil.
Personal discovery and doing something new each day seems like a line woven with way too much of philosophy or asking too much from life and so you would just want to give it an askance and not read further..


Plucking yourself out from routine and jumping into another pond , learning to swim and touching the shore and not simply floating like a lifeless log of wood devoid of direction. I know easy to say in some poetic bullshit but a tuff call to take and worst of it all most of the time you don’t know when the timing is right.

Personally I have rotated in this idea, which to me now seems like a fear which I call "comfortophobia"
Am I willing to take the risk and plunging into a rather uncertain job , a new relationship, a personal union or a different country or city to inhabitate.

I am completely a woman of contradiction here , at all times I constantly need to pep myself to make life less boring on the other I get habituated and attached to things, people, circumstances, coffee mugs, bed sheets, colours, patterns of anything big and small and all other materialistic blocks standing around me.
What I am trying to say that I take much longer time to come out of the perfect circumstance that I push myself to making , as I don’t really live in less than what I really want, once I am there coming out of it is a task and coaxing myself for something different and better becomes rather a herculean task .

We do get pulled into directions one which lets us discover more about us but definitely brings change and sometimes causes havoc in our comfort areas , the other which lets us a beat more closer to a mundane life.

Well I still can’t fathom ways to come out of it every now and then , but I have been able to arrive at a few gruesome reasons that leave me/us in such a muddle.
Is it - fear of loosing your independence - Danger of not knowing youself completely and getting on to your wrong side - Confusion of what does and does not work best in favour and bring you closer to the desired end - Risk of not being able to go back to where you made a good start. - Being pushed by contradictory goals and motivations - Not trusting or getting influenced by anyone too much, but your self... you are the factor and you have to live with it..

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